Alex vs. Little Johnny

My son has been replaced by a miniature heavy equipment operator.

He watches Mighty Machines on TV, plays with his toy digger for hours and wears a hard hat to school.

He knows the location of nearly every construction site at the University of B.C. and can somehow fit a "digger sound" into most sentences.

Everytime we back up the van or bicycle he yells "Beep, beep, beep" just as a piece of heavy equipment does when it backs up.

It could be worse.

He could be like Little Johnny.

Little Johnny and his dad where buying groceries when Little Johnny noticed a very large woman standing in front of them.

In his outside voice he yells: "Dad! Dad! Look at that fat lady!"

Dad whispers:"Shush, that's rude."

But that doesn't stop Little Johnny.

"Dad! Dad! That has to be the fattest person I've ever seen!" he says even louder.

"Johnny, shush. That's rude," replied an embarrassed Dad.

"But Dad," Little Johnny yells at the top of his lungs, "Her butt is ginormous."

Just then the alarm on the lady's watch started beeping.
"Dad! Dad! Watch out, she's backing up! She's backing up!"